Bitter, Party of One!

When you've been burned as many times as I have (and believe me, that's a lot), it gets easier and easier to become completely bitter and shut off emotionally. Case in point: one night I was out with some friends and they said "Oooh that guy is cute! You should talk to him!" To which I replied "Oh sure. He's cute. We'll probably exchange numbers, go on a maximum of three dates, after which one of us will inevitably decide that we cannot possibly have a future together and part ways none the wiser. But at least I'll get some free meals out of it." Yeah, I know, but don't judge until you've read the whole post!

The point is, after so many disappointments, it gets increasingly harder to man up for potential new relationships. I find myself to be a Jaded Dater. I go out with these lovely fellows who never even have a chance to begin with because I am so totally convinced they will end up hating me (if I don't already want to gouge my own eyes in their company) that I will not even give them a chance to like me. One time, a guy said to me "I really like you." He had this adorable, naive smile on his face (and by adorable and naive I mean INSANELY hot). Most girls would think that was the greatest freaking thing ever (did I mention he was gorgeous?). Not so with this chica. I replied with a scathing, "Yeah...for now. In 5 months tops I guarantee you will never want to see my face again." Good thing there was a nice bottle of Chianti close by...

So I examine myself. Is it really bad to be this way? I mean, if I actually could live with not going on dates, I would be saving a lot of people a lot of trouble. Not to mention a fair portion of the male race would keep their various self-esteems in tact. But dating never really goes the way we want it to does it? What IS the way we want it to go? Marriage? If not that, then a relationship doomed to fail at some point anyway? I can honestly say after every failed relationship I've had, I thought "If I had known this would happen I would never have dated him. SO not worth it." You all know you've been there. And if you haven't, well, save your adorable "Someday Your Prince Will Come" routine for the four-year-old girl you babysit who still believes such nonsense. Or read my first post on "Being a Catch."

So I'm a cynical, bitter woman right? The epitome of all those who become cat-ladies? Not quite. While I do find days when the outlook is bleak, I also find that being negative all the time makes me look old, causes me to lose sleep, and ultimately gives me less to blog about without fresh dating stories. This is not to say never be negative. We need to acknowledge and process those feelings. But remember too, as easy as it is to just give it all up, keeping a positive outlook makes everything seem a little less gloomy. How do I do this? Well here reader, is a list of things I do to remind myself that life, even when people are stupid (WHICH IS ALL THE TIME), is still an amazing thing to be lived.

Blues Busters A-La-Me:
-play piano
-work out hard core
-go to the beach [summer Blue-Buster only]
-re-read I Love You, Beth Cooper
[NOTE: Movie inevitably sucks, as Beth Cooper is a brunette, sorry Hayden. I highly encourage you to read this tale. HILARIOUS.]
-get a nice bottle of wine and watch True Blood
[No, I do not heat the wine to 98.6 degrees to get into the mood...not anymore anyway...]
-hang out with my peeps

I'm sure if you put your mind to it, you can put this pitiful list to shame. It seems a little rudimentary I admit, but you'd be surprised how doing something you love puts you in a much better place than if you think about the stuff that makes you angry all the time. So take your one or two days to fume, be miserable, and eat too many pieces of pizza, but keep in mind that it is much better for your complexion and life at large to keep things happy and light. And remember: Bitter and Buzz-Kill go hand-in-hand folks, and that is NEVER a party of two.